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31‏/1‏/2012

Strategies to reduce school bullying





There are several strategies which address ways to help reduce bullying, these include:  


  • Make sure an adult knows what is happening to their children.
  • Actually enforce anti bully laws.
  • Make it clear that bullying is never acceptable.
  • Recognize that bullying can occur at all levels within the hierarchy of the school (i.e., including adults).
  • Hold a school conference day or forum devoted to bully/victim problems.
  • Increase adult supervision in the yard, halls and washrooms more vigilantly.
  • Emphasize caring, respect and safety.
  • Emphasize consequences of hurting others.
  • Enforce consistent and immediate consequences for aggressive behaviors.
  • Improve communication among school administrators, teachers, parents and students.
  • Have a school problem box where kids can report problems, concerns and offer suggestions.
  • Teach cooperative learning activities.
  • Help bullies with anger control and the development of empathy.
  • Encourage positive peer relations.
  • Offer a variety of extracurricular activities which appeal to a range of interests
  • Teach your child to defend himself or herself, verbally and physically, if necessary.
  • Keep in mind the range of possible causes: e.g., medical, psychiatric, psychological, developmental, family problems, etc.
  • If problems continue in your school, press harassment charges against the family of the person who is bullying you.
  • Adjust teacher preparation programs to include appropriate bullying interventions to use in their classroom. 


    29‏/1‏/2012

    The what if game


    The "What if …" Game 


    One way to help children protect themselves is to practice responses to potentially dangerous
    situations. That way, if necessary, children will know how to react properly and quickly.

     The "What if …" game can make practicing easy and fun. Every time you play, say this to your child, in yourown words:

     If somebody tries to touch you in a way that doesn't feel good, or doesn't seem right, say 'NO!' It's even OKto shout and yell 'NO!Then run away and tell somebody,If the first person doesn't believe you, keep telling people until someone does."



    • What if ... something was bothering you and you did not know what to do about it? Who might be 

    able to help you?
    Answer ... People you trust, such as a parent, another relative, neighbour, teacher.


    • What if ... someone touched your privates and offered you a candy bar to keep it a secret?

    Answer ... Say "NO!" and tell someone.


    • What if ... someone you know put their hand down your pants?

    Answer … Say "NO!" and tell someone. No one is allowed to touch your privates.

    • What if ... someone asked you to touch their privates.
    Answer ... Say "NO!" and tell someone. You are not allowed to touch anyone’s privates and no one should ask you to.


    • What if ... a stranger offered you a ride in a shiny new car?

    Answer ... Never accept rides from a stranger.


    • What if ... you did not want to be hugged by a particular adult just now? 

    Answer ... Say "NO!" to that adult. You may like the person, but you may not want to be hugged at that
    time.

    • What if ... you got a "bad feeling" or felt "yukky" when a grown-up gave you a hug or a big squeeze?

    Answer ... Tell the person you do not like it. You have the right to decide when you want to be hugged or
    touched. Trust your feelings about the way people touch you.

    • What if ... someone is tickling you and it starts to hurt?

    Answer ... Tell them to stop. If they will not stop, call for help. If I am not home at the time, tell me about
    it later.

    • What if ... Mommy, daddy or a doctor touched the private parts of your body?

    Answer ... Grown-ups do not usually need to touch children in private areas unless it is for health
    reasons.

    • What if ... the baby sitter or the mad or the gardener wanted to touch you under your  clothes?

    Answer ... No one has the right to put their hand under your clothes; force you to touch them; touch your
    body; or touch your private body parts.


    • What if ... your uncle (aunt) wanted you to sit on his (her) lap and you did not want to?

    Answer... You can say "NO!" to your uncle/aunt if, for some reason, you do not want to do it.



    play it :)

    25‏/1‏/2012

    you can help lessen the chance of sexual abuse



    To protect your child you need to know what the definitions of sexual abuse/incest are. Teaching children about sexual abuse, with safety information appropriate to their age, can help lessen the chance of sexual abuse:
    • Tell children “if someone puts their hand down your pants or does things that make you feel funny, say NO to that person and tell me right away”;
    • Make sure that children know the correct names for body parts: penis, vagina, anus;
    • Don’t tell children to, “Always do everything the teacher or older people tells you to do”;
    • Make sure children know other trusted adults that they can tell, apart from yourself like their ants uncles your friends
    Remember, if you eliminate or reduce one child/one adult situations, you will dramatically lower the risk of sexual abuse.
    If a child tells you that s/he has been sexually abused, stay calm. You may feel uncomfortable and may not know what to say or do. Encourage him or her to talk freely but do not press the child to tell you details. Don’t make judgmental comments. Show that you understand and take them seriously. Your response to the disclosure of sexual abuse is critical to the child’s ability to resolve and heal any effects of sexual abuse.
    Assure the child that they did the right thing in telling you. A child who is close to the abuser may feel guilty or frightened about revealing the secret. Tell the child that he or she is not to blame. Most children in attempting to make sense out of the abuse will believe that somehow they caused it.
    Finally, offer the child protection, and assure them that you will do all you can to stop the abuse. There are many resources available to help victims and their families. 

    save a child...save the world

    How much do we know about Sexual Abuse of Boys ??




    Sexual abuse of boys is common, underreported, under-recognized, and under-treated,Sexual abuse of girls has been widely studied, leading to awareness of the risk factors and prevalence.Unfortunately,there have been relatively fewer studies done on sexual abuse of boys, leading toinadequate knowledge about the facts related to this topic.Some of the studies that are available have a high degree of subjectivity, poor sampling techniques, and poor designs with few control elements. 





      Boys are less likely than girls to report sexual abuse because of fear, the social stigma against homosexual behavior, the desire to appear self-reliant (boys grow up believing that they should not allow themselves to be harmed or talk about painful experiences) , and the concern for loss of independence.


      Furthermore, evidence suggests that,one in every three incidents of child sexual abuse are not remembered by the adults who experienced them, and that the younger the child was at the time of the abuse, and the closer the relationship to the abuser, the more likely one is that the child will not be able to recall the 
    event.




    Recognize the Warning Signs

    The behavior of children may signal abuse or neglect long before any change in physical appearance. Some of the signs may include:
    • Nervousness around adults
    • Aggression toward adults or other children
    • Inability to stay awake or to concentrate for extended periods 
    • Sudden, dramatic changes in personality or activities
    • Unnatural interest in sex
    • Frequent or unexplained bruises or injuries
    • Low self-esteem
    • Poor hygiene
    If you see these signs in any children you know, reach out to them and to their parents and offer a helping hand.

    What You Can Do


     Anything you do to support kids and parents can help

     reduce the stress that often leads to abuse and neglect. 




    Be a friend to a parent you know:
     Ask how their children are doing. Draw on your own experiences to provide reassurance and support. If a parent seems to be struggling, offer to baby-sit or run errands, or just lend a friendly ear. Show you understand.

    Be a friend to a child you know:
     Remember their names. Smile when you talk with them. Ask them about their day at school. Send them a card in the mail. Show you care.

    Talk to your neighbors about looking out for one another's children:
     Encourage a supportive spirit among parents in your apartment building or on your block. Show that you are involved.

    Give your used clothing, furniture and toys for use by another family:
     This can help relieve the stress of financial burdens that parents sometimes take out on their kids.

    Volunteer your time and money for programs in your community that support children and families, like parent support groups, day care centers,Dar al Aman.


    12‏/1‏/2012

    فينادون لنردد من ورائهم

    خلال طريقي  اليومي  إلى  مكان  عملي فاني امر بمحطات عديدة مميزة في وطننا  اصبحت من معالم العاصمة ابرزها رئاسة الوزراء...فيصادف غالبا وجود اما متظاهرين او معتصمين  لمؤسسة ما أو شركة  او حتى دائرة حكومية صغيرة في مؤسسة عامة  يطالبون  بحقوق هي لهم أصلا تتمحور جميعها حول مراكز اساسية في حياة المواطن الصالح لعيش كريم (محاربة الفساد و الفقر،التعليم،الصحة)و غيرها يحاولون  اخذها  عنوة من خلال شعارات مناؤة للسياسات المتبعة حاليا و كانها اصبحت هي الصحيح و ما هو الصحيح خاطئ و محرم عليك ان تطالب به .. و تحولت هذه المطالب الاساسية و للاسف في وطننا الغالي أصبحت أحلام صعبة المنال .

    لكن أكثر ما يستهويني و يحرك الدمع لينزل من عيني بشكل تلقائي دون قدرة على السيطرة عليه..هومنظر رجال ونساء تتجاوز أعمارهم الستين عقدا  و ينطبق عليهم القول المأثور إشتعلت الرؤوس شيبا..ليس فقط تعاطفا معهم لأنهم أصبحوا في مثل هذا العمر و مازالو يطالبون بأبسط حقوقهم و إنما إصراهم على ذلك و أملهم بمستقبل أفضلا لأبنائهم و أبناء الوطن.. و مما يزيد فخري بهم أن لا أحد يستطيع إتهامهم بإمتلاك أجندة خارجية لأن كل ما يهدفون إليه هو تحقيق عيش كريم لهم و لأسرهم و معظمهم لم يغادر هذه البلد لضيق الحال...كذلك لا يحق لأي شخص إتهامهم بالتقليد لأن أشخاص بأعمارهم كل ما يرغبون به هو الهدوء و الإستقرار.. و الجميل أيضا أنه لايعقل أن يقال عليهم أنهم مثيرين للشغب و الفوضى لأنهم يعتقدون كامل الإعتقاد بأن هذا البلد بيتهم و جزءا منهم  و أعمارهم لا تسمح بذلك... و بالطبع لا يطمعون بتبوء مراكز عليا لأنها اصلا ليست من اهتمامهم..

    كم أشعر بالفخر عند النظر إليهم يحملون علم الأردن و في عيونهم إصرارا كبيرا لغد أفضل و حزننا عميقا على حال وطنهم و ما آل  إليه.. عيوني تذهب إليهم عند وجودي معهم  في أي إعتصام أو أي مسيرة حتى أستمد منهم القوة لمواجهة الواقع و الأمل لمستقبل أفضل.. فينادون لنردد من ورائهم


    خبز..حرية..عدالة إجتماعية




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